“Nobody’s a Saint.”

Sarah Jickling leans forward slightly as she twirls a long strand of dark brown hair around the finger of her left hand. She has spent the last several minutes seated across from me at a bustling coffee shop in Vancouver explaining how difficult it was to write the songs for her newest album The Family Curse. On it, the Vancouver musician and mental health advocate chronicles her paradoxical upbringing living with a parent with an untreated mental illness and then her own diagnosis of bi-polar disorder. The album is Jickling’s second as a solo artist and the first body of work that she has released “fully stable and medicated.”

Fans of Canadian indie pop-rock probably already know of Sarah Jickling through her earlier project The Oh Wells and their underground EP’s I’m not that girl from Transformer’s and Roll With the Punches. Jickling attributes her best friend from high school and Oh-Wells co-founder as one of the main reasons she began to focus on music because of her enthusiasm towards having a career as musicians.

“I just felt happier when I was with her.” She explains.

When the Oh Wells eventually disbanded several transformations later, Jickling felt as though the band was just gaining momentum. She was too invested to give it up, so she continued to focus on making music. Her first solo effort was a nine-track album titled When I get better which she describes as a “medication journey” following her diagnosis. As with Kanye West and many other artists who experience being bi-polar, the medication that eventually helped her maintain a balanced emotional state also left her with a wicked case of writer’s block. It was a side effect that she was more than happy to accept.

“Saint,” The first track from The Family Curse was the first song Jickling was able to write while being on medication. She was processing the memories and emotions that spending an extended period of time with her family had brought up for her. Although she initially struggled with disclosing such intimate revelations about herself and her family, she eventually decided the song needed to come out “for the girl that had been terrified for so much of her life.”

The result is a compelling and unflinching look at the effects of her unpredictable and often traumatic childhood. The album is wrought with fiercely honest lyrics delivered in Jickling’s deliciously luscious vocals. Traces of Kate Nash, Lily Allen and Kimya Dawson are infused throughout. The albums’ decidedly pop feel belies the heavy subject matter it illustrates, in many ways echoing the experiences that inspired it. Although the songs that flowed came from a place of anger and hurt, Jickling persevered with the hope that they would eventually lead her to a place of forgiveness, a concept that she is learning is more of a process than a destination.

Back at the coffee shop in Mount Pleasant, Jickling tugs on the knot holding up her maroon overalls. The veiled forehead of innovative songstress Janelle Monae pokes out above its’ bib from a black t-shirt with the words “Dirty Computer” etched on the sleeve.

Things are going well for Sarah Jickling. She’s not angry anymore, she’s holding space for healing within her own family, and she is carving a new path for herself in the music industry. She has teamed up with the BC Schizophrenia Society and currently tours schools performing music and talking about her mental illness. She loves the feeling of purpose it brings her and credits comedienne Maria Bamford with helping to inspire her own decision to seek help. Hearing someone speaking honestly about the highs and lows of her own struggles with mental health helped normalize the ordeal for her.

“Mania can be unbearable and terrifying.” She confides.

She hopes that by sharing her story she can help others who are dealing with mental health issues, not only on a personal level but also for those whose loved ones suffer. She understands first hand how complicated life can be not only as someone experiencing hypo mania but as someone who experienced it through a loved one.

Jickling cradles the mug in front of her with both hands and smiles. “I’m just so grateful for the people who stayed.”

Sarah Jickling will be performing at the Red Gate Revue Stage to celebrate the release of The Family Curse on November 8th. Details Below!